I am a new woman! I spent five hours having Sexy Sexy Hairdresser pulling and scraping and stabbing away at my head. The only problem was, he used hair-related tools to stab away at my face area and I could have quite preferred other stabbing-tools being used. But what's a girl to do?
I love Sexy Sexy Hairdresser. Almost with an ache in my groin, but not quite.
Sexy Sexy Hairdresser: What are we doing with your hair today, Pant?
The Pant: Well, there's two corrections there. Number one: you will be doing the hair. I will be perving over you and enjoying the attention that you'll have to bestow on me because I am a paying customer. And number two: it's already four o'clock so I think it would be more accurate to have used the word 'evening' rather than 'today'.
Sexy Sexy Hairdresser was applying a top deck look to a lady sitting opposite me. I didn't want to be the one to tell her that top-deck went out with the advent of coconut and pistachio, because, really, who am I in her life? Besides which, I was in Pietermaritzburg (this is the only problem I have with Sexy Sexy Hairdresser) and Pietermaritzburg truly is the capital of in-breeding. I was astounded by the number of orange-hued people I saw as I stealthily crept through its dirty streets.
Sexy Sexy Hairdresser: Why don't we do a Brazilian?
What I didn't say was, "Oh don't you worry, my pet. I swung by the beautician's on the way here in the hopes that you might ask me."
What I did say was:
The Pant: There are a lot of people around, but, okay. If that's what you want pal, who am I to argue?
I left feeling like an altogether fabulous human being a mere six (four, five, six - who's counting after two?) hours later. Okay, sure, I'd missed my post work afternoon snack - and anyone who knows The Pant knows that you don't mess with her post work snack, lest annorexia sets in. I was feeling so thin by the time I left the salon, that the bones in my arms, also called elbows, were sticking out. Now that's thin.
Anyway, it was nothing short of sheer entertainment because I got to see him cutting this number. The man arrived with a fro so enormous that I developed an instant anti-white complex towards myself. And he then left looking like this:
Happy Easter everyone. The Daughter and I are very very EGGScited that we are finding standing up a challenge.